Friday, October 13, 2006

The Shoe Menace, Part II

I've had some time to think this over, after I DID get hold of their corporate Customer Service line and left several detailed messages about the incident.

I suspect this girl was pretty new, maybe her first time dealing with the store on her own. What she did was right smack out of a training manual "Greet them as they arrive, offer to help them find their size".

Not a bad opening, but she could have done better. A quiet "Hi, welcome to Payless, can I help you find something?" is a lot better than demanding my shoe-size in a loud voice as I walk in the door!

This reminds me of a joke that a friend sent me yesterday morning:

An old man walks into the crowded waiting room of a Dr.'s office and asks to see the doctor. The receptionist asks him "What is the problem?". The man is obviously uncomfortable and says "I'd like to wait and discuss that with the doctor".

The receptionist is adamant, demanding to know his ailment before she will even put his name on the list to see the doctor, and finally the man says "There's something wrong with my dick!"

The receptionist, aghast, tells the man that it is inappropriate for him to mention his "member" in a crowded room, that there are people there who are embarassed now! "You should say something like 'I'm having a problem with my ear' instead."

The man thinks for a moment, nods, then walks out, and walks back in again. The receptionist smiles and asks "What are you here for, sir?". The old man replies "I'm having a problem with my ear". The receptionist beams, so glad she has finally gotten through to him.

"And just what is the problem with your ear, Sir?" she asks.

"I can't piss out of it"

See, like the old man, I don't want to have to advertise my shoe size to the whole farking store. If I'm given the opportunity to accept or reject assistance, I'm more likely to look favorably upon the clerk. "Welcome to Payless, is there something I can help you find?" Allows me to say "Just browsing, thank you".

Now the "come back in a little while and tell you about our promotion" - I'm sure in some sense this is probably an anti-shoplifting tool that they are taught, and I don't disapprove. While I myself will not shoplift shoes there, I am sure some idjits do, and I don't begrudge management trying to control theft.

What I resent is being informed that "I don't trust you. I'm sure you are going to rip my store off, so I'm going to pester you about promotions that any well-educated 10 year old can understand", hidden behind a perky, bouncy "helpful" exterior.

Don't tell me. Do it. After I've been poking around in the shoes for a few minutes, find an excuse to walk past me and mention "I'm not sure if you noticed, but we have a buy-one-get-2nd-half-price sale". Ok, now you have fulfilled your commitment to mention your promo, you've made sure I havent stuffed 8 boxes of shoes in my bra, AND you've managed to be quiet, discrete and unoffensive.

HELL, I'd even settle for another drive-by "Finding what you need?" later on as well, as you reassure yourself I'm not stuffing wedgies down my undies.

This kid needs a massive dose of "Tact Training".

More questions from Jules:

Fill in the things you've done:

(X) Smoked a joint
( ) Done cocaine
(X) Been in love
( ) Had a threesome
(X) Been dumped
(X) Shoplifted
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back
( ) Been arrested
(X) Made out with a stranger
(X) Gone on a blind date
( ) Had a crush on a teacher
( ) Been to Europe
(X) Been to Canada
(X) Been to Mexico
(X) Seen someone die
( ) Thrown up in a bar
(X) Met a celebrity
(X) Met someone from the internet in person
( ) Been moshing at a concert
(X) Gone backstage at a concert
(X) Lain outside in the grass and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) Made a snow angel
(X) Flown a kite
(X) Cheated while playing a game
(X) Been lonely
(X) Fallen asleep at work (NOT THIS JOB, MR. VICE PRESIDENT!)
( ) Fallen asleep at school
( ) Used a fake ID
( ) Been kicked out of a bar
( ) Felt an earthquake
(X) Touched a snake
(X) Slept beneath the stars
(X) Been robbed
(X) Won a contest
(X) Run a red light
( ) Been suspended from school
( ) Had braces
(X) Felt like an outcast
(X) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(X) Had deja vu
( ) Totaled a car
( ) Stolen a car
(X) Hated the way you look
( ) Witnessed a crime
( ) Been to a strip club
( ) Been to the opposite side of the world
(X) Swum in the ocean
(X) Felt like dying
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
( ) Sung karaoke
( ) Paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) Been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) Had a bonfire on the beach
( ) Crashed a party
(X) Seen a tornado
(X) Had a wish come true
( ) Gone bungee jumping
(X) Screamed in public
( ) Told a complete stranger you loved them
(X) Had a one night stand
( ) Kissed a mirror
(X) Had a dream that you married someone
(X) Gotten your fingers stuck together with super glue
( ) Been a cheerleader
(X) Sat on a roof top
(X) Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours straight
(X) Stayed up all night
( ) Not taken a shower for three days
( ) Made contact with a ghost while playing a Ouija board
( ) Had more than 30 pairs of shoes at a time
( ) Gone streaking
(X) Been skinny dipping
(X) Been pushed into a pool/lake with all your clothes on
(X) Had sex in a public or semi-public place
(X) Been kissed by a complete stranger
(X) Broken a bone
(X) Caught a butterfly
(X) Mooned/flashed someone
( ) Had someone moon/flash you
(X) Cheated on a test
(X) Forgotten someone’s name
(X) Slept naked

Bah, I'm not even going to TRY and explain some of those... although some could do with a bit...

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Excedrine Headache #10001191054265625763561

The Shoe Store Menace

I hate buying shoes. I like having new shoes, I just hate buying them. I hate the stores, I hate the styles, I hate the hassle, and I really, really hate the clerks.

So I go into Payless today at lunch. I don't NEED new shoes yet, but it's just a matter of time. So I was in the mood, what with having gotten a pedicure last nite and feeling all happy and pink-toe-nail silly, and I thought it a good time to try for some new footwear.

So I go into Payless... a store I've always been thankfully ignored in previously... and there's this looks-like-all-of-17 sales clerk there who BOUNCES up and asks me what shoe size I'm looking for, she wants to show me where they are.

Excuse me. You have big fucking numbers with the shoe sizes hanging from the shelves. I'm not illiterate, you bouncy little retail git.

No, I wasn't THAT blunt. I just said "Thanks, but I think I can find it." To which she informed me "OK, well, I'll let you have a LITTLE time to look around, and then I'll come and tell you about our promotion!!!" Yes, you could hear the fucking exclamation points. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

I AM FIFTY FUCKING YEARS OLD. I've been buying my own shoes for over THIRTY YEARS. I'm an ACCOUNTANT. I do NOT need some rah-rah CHEERLEADER RETAIL SALES LOSER GIT to explain the oh-so-difficult concept of "Buy one pair, get the 2nd pair of equal or lesser value at half off".

I got so pissed off I just walked out. No new shoes today. Besides, if I refused to listen to her perky, bouncy little explanation, she might could have hurt me with a Brannock Device.

I am seriously considering seeing if there is a website for a corporate office for Payless Shoes and having a bit of a chat with their Customer Service folks.

Yes, I am mean.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Six Years Isn't Long Enough

According to Senator McCain, Bill Clinton has been setting foreign policy and "takin' care of bidness" for the last 6 years.

Ok, that isn't EXACTLY what he said - but exactly WHEN does an EX-president stop being responsible for the foreign policy faux pas and world-incidents that happen after they leave office?

While I am firmly of the belief that had this country not immorally stolen the election from Al Gore, 9/11/01 would NEVER HAVE HAPPENED - I believe that it was the election of yet another George Bush that caused that - I will concede that there may have been some possibility of a residual effect from actions taken 10 months or more previously to that date. 9 months isn't really all that long, and it is possible that George Bush was still "learning the ropes" and wasn't responsible.

I don't believe that, but I will grant the inconcievably slim possiblity that it is true.

But for McCain to try and blame the current out-of-control nonsense of Kim Jong Il (MR. Bad Hair Day) on President Clinton has entirely lost McCain any vestige respect I formerly had for him - most of which I lost in the last 2 weeks when he FLIP FLOPPED on the Torture Approval and Repeal of Habeus Corpus Act of 2006.

A Tale of Two Parties

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that someof its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

And of late, with an evil king upon the throne of Washington, I am feeling more and more like Madame Defarge and wanting to take up knitting again...

Viva La Revolution!!

Monday, October 09, 2006

New Links

Ok, tonite I added more of my regularly-read blog links to the links at right.

I know I didn't get everyone, because some of the blogs I read regularly I read at lunch at work, so I only have them bookmarked there. I'm hoping to remember to send myself the links here at home so I can add them to the roster soon. If you're not there, please! I didn't forget you! I just can't remember everything, especially since 1/2 of everything is elsewhere.


Oh My My

Seems former Secretary of State Baker doesn't agree with the Shrub on his "Stay The Course" sloganism.

Isn't it ironic that what we, the much-maligned "Libs", have known for over 2 years - is finally sinking through to the Republicans?


Memories with Manda

My daughter, Amanda, used to be called by me "Manda", as I just really don't like the nickname "Mandy" (Barry Manilow's DOG), and she wasn't really a "Mandy" type for the most part.

I remember when she was in the upper part of grade school - 5th grade or so maybe? We had a string of incidents happen while we were eating at a particular Wendys restaurant. This would be the Army Trail Wendy's near Bloomingdale Road, for anyone who gives a rats ass.

Anyhow - at least twice or 3 times while we were eating there, there were really bad car accidents right out front of the restaurant. One time just as we left the drive-thru, a car started on fire about 1/2 a block west of the restaurant. After about 3 of these incidents, I decided the Wendys was cursed and that we were causing the traffic issues. Manda by this time was old enough not to buy into my silliness automatically, and would do the "MOMMMMM!!!!" thing. I know I must have embarassed the hell out of her, but I never did it in front of anyone else.

Well, Manda?? I've cursed a new restaurant, it appears. The last 2 times I've gone to the Baker's Square on Barrington (Dr. Nick - you might wanna go take out another gall bladder or something), there have been major traffic accidents at the stoplight right outside. I just KNOW it's me... *wink and a grin*

Sucks to get old - I don't recommend it.


I remember when I used to have the energy to stay out all night and still wander into work on time and do productively. Last night I realized that just isn't in my game plan anymore.

I play this highly addictive online MMORPG video game called "World of Warcraft" - with about a dozen folks, most of whom I consider to be RL friends, although we live all over the country away from one another.

Sunday night is the only night that the five "founding members" of our little group can all be around at the same time for a few hours, so we do "dungeon runs" then - working our way through areas that are set-aside by the server for just our group, and battling significantly more difficult monsters than one finds in most of the non-dungeon lands. We started grouping like this when our characters were all "babies" - "Noobs" - and we've worked our way up to our first-ever level 60 (highest level in game at THIS point - pre-expansion pack) dungeon which we ran last night.

Well, we ran SOME of it last night. Unfortunately, this is where the "old" bit kicks in. Two of us ladies in the group (group has 3 ladies, 2 men), are over the big Five-Oh. And it's getting to where carpal tunnel, edema and monitor-migraine are making it hard for us to do the longer runs. Last night I had an idea, and it seemed to work.

Shortly before we entered the dungeon "Instance", I started a timer that had been preset for 3 1/2 hours... the maximum I wanted to sit and play. Everyone was OK with it, and we started in. What was cool for me, is that we actually hit the end of the nights' scheduled "jobs" almost EXACTLY as the timer went off.

What is uncool is that we had to leave so much undone. But my hands are still a bit painful, and I've got a bit of headache, although not as much as usual. At least this compromise solution is helping some. Perhaps with time it will become do-able.

For the Horde!!