Thursday, January 31, 2008

Strange things on the way home from work

You know those little dangly "air freshener" things that hang from rear-view mirrors in cars?

Usually shaped like dolphins or pine trees or flowers?

This guy behind me had one. Not unusual. What was unusual was the "saying" that was on it. It was just a white square... You know how people use a "heart" symbol for "love"? Like "I (heart) my Rottweiler" bumper stickers?

This guy was advertising that he (heart) his penis.

Right.

Ok.

Yes.

Ahem.

So.

I stop at my favorite store on the way home to buy a telephone cable because I'm going to do some furniture-moving in the livingroom and will need a longer telephone cable. In I go, and out I come with a cable, a packet of "Twinkies", a DVD, 2 air-fresheners, a candle and a package of socks.

And parked not 10 inches from my driver-side door is a fucking grey Hummvee.

There isn't enough room between his fucking tank and my door for a fucking anorexic supermodel to get into my car, much less pudgy lil' me.

And this asswipe is on his cellphone in the driver's seat - rather POINTEDLY ignoring me.

So he gets out, and starts in to the store, at which point I say loud enough for the folks in the next county to hear "So, I guess I'll have to wait for him to get done shopping to move his TANK so I can get in my car"

He comes back "It's just a big car..."

"You've parked it on the line - I cannot possibly get into my car with your TANK there - could you please move it?"

General Patton got into his tank in a huff and moved off 6 slots further away from me. Worked for me. Fucking asshat. What, just because HE doesn't care about the environment means I have to wait for him to get done shopping in order to drive home?

Not bloody likely.

I'll try and download that "Trillian" thing tonite after work, V. Thanks.


354 days

4 comments:

FOUR DINNERS said...

You can get them saying that????

I am off to the shops first thing.

It's a man thing. Especially if you haven't a big car.....

Yes car. That is what I meant to say....;-)

Oh gimme a break!!! Word veri thingy 'bygcokx'.

They did that on purpose!!!!!

visionary said...

I don't have anything against big road cruisers and trucks. By all means if you can afford it. I try not to judge people on such things. I do, however, have something against people who buy mega big vehicles and then don't learn to drive them.

You should have scratched L2P4rk on his door.

BBC said...

My air freshener says "This is Ford country, on a quite night you can hear a Chevy rust".

My bumper stickers are about peace and being green.

And parked not 10 inches from my driver-side door is a fucking grey Hummvee.

People that buy big rigs are assholes that don't care about you or the planet. There are a few Hummvee's in this town, they all seem to be driven by women, bitches that don't care about anyone else.

It's not that they don't know how to drive, they just don't give a damn. Yeah, do feel free to judge them.

Croila said...

Erm, I might be reading too much into this, but I don't think that air freshener picture was necessarily celebrating HIS thingy. Wouldn't it be implying that he likes, er, "thingies" in general? ;-)

What a pig that guy in the tank sounds. He'd have soon complained if you snapped his wing-mirror back when you were trying to get past eh. What's the point of having a vehicle that size anyway? I can maybe see the point if you regularly have loads of kit to lug about, but for your general punter? Nah, it's just a stupid perceived status symbol. To any of us with sense it makes the guy look like a wanker, but the dickhead probably thinks he's cool!