Friday, December 14, 2007

X-Mas Carols Rant

[rant on]

Since Nancy Pelosi still insists that impeachment is "off the table,

All I want for Christmas is for Mariah Carey to SHUT THE FUCK UP

And yes, John, This is Christmas - so shut the fuck up, you're dead and your wife's an old hag who can't sing.

What the fuck happened to the old fashioned "Firestone Christmas Album" carols that they played in the stores when I was a mere lass? Bing and Burl and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, Handel, Tschaicovski and the Vienna Eunuch's Choir? Jingle Bells and Silent Night and Hark! The Herald Angels Sing, the Sleighride song, and roasting your chestnuts over an open fire? Tannenbaumen und Wassail?

While I think it's cute that Grandma got run over by a reindeer, and I'll gladly buy Alvin that Hoola Hoop he's wanted for years, and I always giggle at "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" - when it comes time for that "Old Xmas Spirit" - I just can't get it from John and Mariah. And unfortunately, those seem to be the ONLY two songs they're playing in stores I patronize this year.

Bah.

HUMBUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rant off]

402 Days

8 comments:

BBC said...

I don't listen to Christmas carols, I have a mind and can tune them out and not let them upset me.

"Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear"

Really? Never heard that one.

So tell me something Sew, when are you going to stop being pissed at me?
Just asking hon.

Visionary, before you reply, here is my response. Fuck you, you are an idiot. *Smiles sweetly*

Ah!!! Sewmouse taught me that phrase, and I love her to pieces for the things we have learned together.

visionary said...

I am glad to see you still care, Bilbo.

Ps. She still hates you. ,|,,Oo,,|,

*gushes with happiness*

>_<

BBC said...

Visionary... She hates everyone you idiot, including herself.

She hates and loves them at the same time. That is what is so lovable about her. :-)

Now craw back into your hole you little pecker head. :-)

BBC said...

And if you knew anything about love you would know that she couldn't hate me unless she loved me first. Hate is just another word for love that got twisted.

I've studied more about love than you have ever given any thought to. Some people study history, I study love.

Jules said...

"All I want for Christmas is for Mariah Carey to SHUT THE FUCK UP"

Grief, yes.

Mr Farty said...

Hey, hey, Mariah Carey is a beautiful, talented woman, with the widest vocal range of any living musician and a fantastic pair of melons.

Still can't stand her.

visionary said...

For all that studying Billy and you still can't find it... well the reciprocal variety anyhow.

Babzy said...

I like the old Christmas songs by the old Christmas song singers, too.