Since Nancy Pelosi still insists that impeachment is "off the table,
All I want for Christmas is for Mariah Carey to SHUT THE FUCK UP
And yes, John, This is Christmas - so shut the fuck up, you're dead and your wife's an old hag who can't sing.
What the fuck happened to the old fashioned "Firestone Christmas Album" carols that they played in the stores when I was a mere lass? Bing and Burl and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, Handel, Tschaicovski and the Vienna Eunuch's Choir? Jingle Bells and Silent Night and Hark! The Herald Angels Sing, the Sleighride song, and roasting your chestnuts over an open fire? Tannenbaumen und Wassail?
While I think it's cute that Grandma got run over by a reindeer, and I'll gladly buy Alvin that Hoola Hoop he's wanted for years, and I always giggle at "Walkin' Round in Women's Underwear" - when it comes time for that "Old Xmas Spirit" - I just can't get it from John and Mariah. And unfortunately, those seem to be the ONLY two songs they're playing in stores I patronize this year.