Monday, November 07, 2005


Well, Thursday and Friday I am taking off work. Going to fly down to Florida and see Mom and Dad.

Stopping for a long layover in Atlanta, hopefully to see a few friends on the way down for an hour or so. Wish it could be longer, but I haven't a lot of time here.

Part of me is glad to be going. I need a break from home and work. But most of me is afraid of what I will find when I get down there.

Paul's constant harping on how bad off Mom is - and Dad's semi-confirmation - has me worried. I've told Aunt Lorraine about the trip, I'll talk to them when I get back. I'm just afraid of what I'll see, what I will find out. The unknown is so difficult for me. I feel like I've got it under control, that I know how I'll deal with it, having Mom not know me... but... do I? will I?

What I really want to do is go down there and do some cooking for Dad's sake, because he never could cook much... and try to spend "quality time" with them. If for some reason he doesn't want me there one of the 2 days I'm REALLY there (not-travelling) I will go to Disney or something. But I'd really rather be there with them.

I'm really afraid of what will happen to Dad if Mom does go. And I do believe that if he puts her in a "home", she will pass quickly, like Paul wants.

Growing Up Sucks.

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