Blatantly stolen from a mass-forwarded e-mail:
Subject: Immaculate Contraption
Can you imagine yourself to be the nun that is sitting at her desk grading these papers while trying to keep a straight face and maintain her composure!
PAY SPECIAL ATTENTION TO THE WORDING AND SPELLING. IF YOU KNOW THE BIBLE EVEN A LITTLE, YOU'LL FIND THIS HILARIOUS! IT COMES FROM A CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST, KIDS WERE ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS.
THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS ABOUT THE BIBLE WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN. THEY HAVE NOT BEEN RETOUCHED OR CORRECTED. INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.
1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.
2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.
3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT.
4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.
5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH.
6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.
7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.
8, THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.
9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.
10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.
11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA. THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.
12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.
13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.
14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES
15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA
16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN THE MANAGER.
17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.
18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.
19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.
20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.
21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.
22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.
23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.
24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.
25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.
736 days
Saturday, February 03, 2007
Friday, February 02, 2007
Ya know those days you should just drive your car into a tree?
This would be one of them.
I don't even want to talk about it.
My blog is back, however. At least that tiny single thing is going right.
I don't even want to talk about it.
My blog is back, however. At least that tiny single thing is going right.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
It appears I have pissed off the Gods of Google
I can't access my own blog. I can post to it. I can edit posts. I can not, however, actually VIEW it. So this will, doubtless, make anyone who uses one of the "gosh, has she bothered to post lately" engines insane trying to get to what they can't read.
Seethe. Seethe...
It's crazy here right now. Had the auditor in, and he's been in, and gone and now I need to get caught up again.
Long post coming soon, but I need to really consolidate my thoughts before I type it up. Been following the Libby trial some on the Firedoglake site. Fascinating. Maybe Dad is right and I shoulda been a lawyer. I doubt it, though. I don't have the patience to deal with all the little niggly rules and crap.
It is very cold again today, but not QUITE as bad as yesterday - less wind.
I've decided to keep a food diary/bloodsugar/bloodpressure/state of the feet/state of mind/andafewotherthings log in one of my many many many notebooks laying around the house. I'm hoping to find some connection that will expedite getting this stupid so-called-diabetes under control AND at the same time perhaps give some clues into what/why/whatever is causing some other issues. Wouldn't it be nice... da da doo da da....
Ok, back to the salt mine. I WILL get the credit cards done today, I WILL get them done!! I WILL!!!!
738 Days
Seethe. Seethe...
It's crazy here right now. Had the auditor in, and he's been in, and gone and now I need to get caught up again.
Long post coming soon, but I need to really consolidate my thoughts before I type it up. Been following the Libby trial some on the Firedoglake site. Fascinating. Maybe Dad is right and I shoulda been a lawyer. I doubt it, though. I don't have the patience to deal with all the little niggly rules and crap.
It is very cold again today, but not QUITE as bad as yesterday - less wind.
I've decided to keep a food diary/bloodsugar/bloodpressure/state of the feet/state of mind/andafewotherthings log in one of my many many many notebooks laying around the house. I'm hoping to find some connection that will expedite getting this stupid so-called-diabetes under control AND at the same time perhaps give some clues into what/why/whatever is causing some other issues. Wouldn't it be nice... da da doo da da....
Ok, back to the salt mine. I WILL get the credit cards done today, I WILL get them done!! I WILL!!!!
738 Days
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
T'is COLD
Um, Mr. Al Gore Sir?
IT"S FARKING COLD.
And it's making me CRANKY.
(As if I need an excuse!)
So my friend Mike, who has this awesome business where he designs and builds hugongeous competition-quality radio-controlled model (toy.. *duck*) airplanes wants to add a discussion forum-style BBS to his site. With some fancy-schmancy features. One of which is to allow people to post photos there in a one-click method that won't require them to host offsite - just tell the forum post generator "Here, post this picture of my toy airplane" and POOFA!! The picture goes into the post. Not unlike the way we can "POOFA!" pictures into these blogger blogs.
Oh, and he doesn't want it to cost an arm and a leg and several major internal organs. Any ideas/help/links/commisseration will be greatly appreciated.
Check out the "First Church of the Ether" over there by Kvatch who is busily creating epistles for our sacred writings. Or hymns. Or something. Hell, if L. Ron Hubbard can pull off the fake-religion scam, I'm SURE we bloggers can too!!
740 days. ITMFA
IT"S FARKING COLD.
And it's making me CRANKY.
(As if I need an excuse!)
So my friend Mike, who has this awesome business where he designs and builds hugongeous competition-quality radio-controlled model (toy.. *duck*) airplanes wants to add a discussion forum-style BBS to his site. With some fancy-schmancy features. One of which is to allow people to post photos there in a one-click method that won't require them to host offsite - just tell the forum post generator "Here, post this picture of my toy airplane" and POOFA!! The picture goes into the post. Not unlike the way we can "POOFA!" pictures into these blogger blogs.
Oh, and he doesn't want it to cost an arm and a leg and several major internal organs. Any ideas/help/links/commisseration will be greatly appreciated.
Check out the "First Church of the Ether" over there by Kvatch who is busily creating epistles for our sacred writings. Or hymns. Or something. Hell, if L. Ron Hubbard can pull off the fake-religion scam, I'm SURE we bloggers can too!!
740 days. ITMFA
Monday, January 29, 2007
I hate Wells Fargo and WaMu
They've both got the same annoying, aggravating, IN FUCKING FURIATING voice-mail system with the most annoying fucking perky bitches for their autofuckingmated "systems" - even to the point of INTERRUPTING "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik" to tell me they "appreciate my call". Goddess, I hate these people. They should all die in a fire.
All I want is the interest and taxes paid last year so I can get my income tax return rolling. I hate to wait. I want to get this OVER WITH.
Please press 1 if you want us to route you into Voice Mail Hell.
Press 2 for Voice Mail Purgatory
Pressio Threeo Por Espanol
Press 4 if you know your loan number, social security number, Mileage Plus number, Dollar amount of your last 27 bank transactions in chronological order, and can guess how many beans are in the jar on Herb's desk.
Press 5 if you just want to listen to our hold muzak and the repetitive oh-so-soothing droning of our salesbitch.
Press 6 if you need to go to the bathroom and want to call us back later
Press 7 for another huge list of options that really won't get you anywhere.
Press 8 if you want us to laugh at your pathetic attempts to get through our voice mail.
Press 9 for the secret codes to level 20 in Zelda
Press 0 to hear these options again and again and again and again and again.
Press * to go back to the previous menu
Press # to hear the complete lyrics of "Alice's Restaurant" in Armenian.
Die.
Just DIE IN A FIRE.
721 Days - ITMFA
All I want is the interest and taxes paid last year so I can get my income tax return rolling. I hate to wait. I want to get this OVER WITH.
Please press 1 if you want us to route you into Voice Mail Hell.
Press 2 for Voice Mail Purgatory
Pressio Threeo Por Espanol
Press 4 if you know your loan number, social security number, Mileage Plus number, Dollar amount of your last 27 bank transactions in chronological order, and can guess how many beans are in the jar on Herb's desk.
Press 5 if you just want to listen to our hold muzak and the repetitive oh-so-soothing droning of our salesbitch.
Press 6 if you need to go to the bathroom and want to call us back later
Press 7 for another huge list of options that really won't get you anywhere.
Press 8 if you want us to laugh at your pathetic attempts to get through our voice mail.
Press 9 for the secret codes to level 20 in Zelda
Press 0 to hear these options again and again and again and again and again.
Press * to go back to the previous menu
Press # to hear the complete lyrics of "Alice's Restaurant" in Armenian.
Die.
Just DIE IN A FIRE.
721 Days - ITMFA
Friday, January 26, 2007
Looking Ahead
John Good from Left in Aboite asks us today to imagine. I can hear the Wrong-Wing Dittoheads singsonging right now: "Imagine what would have happened if ALGORE had been President on 9/11/01 - we'd all be praying to Allah!" because it is what I hear from a lot of hardcore Republicans still today.
Many folks who don't care all that much about global warming will also see him as a "Tree hugging fruitcake". All those cheddarheads who like to drive their SUV's with the big "PACKERS" bumperstickers and flags still believe that there's no such thing, and that only "dirty hippies" are concerned about the environment.
I do know that my boss has pidgeonholed him as "whipped by his wife". Depending on what the Republicans run against him, I am not certain of his ability to win. And that "ALGORE invented the internet" mis-quote is just never going to go away.
Shrillary does nothing for me. I don't care if she's fem, male, bi, butch, femme or whatever - she comes on too strong, she's got I"M A BITCH AND YOU KNOW IT tattooed on her forehead, and if for no other reason - she is apparently the source of the smear campaign going on against the junior senator from MY STATE - suggesting in oh-so-subtle rhetoric that the school he attended in Indonesia when he was SIX YEARS OLD was some terrorist training ground and he's a "sleeper" terrorist. I can't vote for her. She does not inspire the confidence I need to choose a President.
Unfortunately, I don't think the Senator from New York is really fully aware of just how HATED she is by a surprisingly large segment of the population. Not just disliked, or misunderstood - but truly HATED. She can't win.
Senator Obama impresses me on just about every level, but I will quickly agree that he has limited exposure to the entire process and scope of the Presidency. I am quite glad of the fact that the WORST THING that anyone has found about him thus far is something he had no control over that occurred when he was six years old. I've had written communications with his office (he is MY senator) and I've been impressed with his responses and in agreement with his position in almost all cases.
I really think I need to do a lot more research on who the Republicans are seriously considering for the nomination before I make a decision on the correct side of the aisle. Whoever we put in there needs to be articulate, intelligent and have the best interests of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA and all her people and businesses in mind - not just a few fratbrother cronies.
724 Days
Many folks who don't care all that much about global warming will also see him as a "Tree hugging fruitcake". All those cheddarheads who like to drive their SUV's with the big "PACKERS" bumperstickers and flags still believe that there's no such thing, and that only "dirty hippies" are concerned about the environment.
I do know that my boss has pidgeonholed him as "whipped by his wife". Depending on what the Republicans run against him, I am not certain of his ability to win. And that "ALGORE invented the internet" mis-quote is just never going to go away.
Shrillary does nothing for me. I don't care if she's fem, male, bi, butch, femme or whatever - she comes on too strong, she's got I"M A BITCH AND YOU KNOW IT tattooed on her forehead, and if for no other reason - she is apparently the source of the smear campaign going on against the junior senator from MY STATE - suggesting in oh-so-subtle rhetoric that the school he attended in Indonesia when he was SIX YEARS OLD was some terrorist training ground and he's a "sleeper" terrorist. I can't vote for her. She does not inspire the confidence I need to choose a President.
Unfortunately, I don't think the Senator from New York is really fully aware of just how HATED she is by a surprisingly large segment of the population. Not just disliked, or misunderstood - but truly HATED. She can't win.
Senator Obama impresses me on just about every level, but I will quickly agree that he has limited exposure to the entire process and scope of the Presidency. I am quite glad of the fact that the WORST THING that anyone has found about him thus far is something he had no control over that occurred when he was six years old. I've had written communications with his office (he is MY senator) and I've been impressed with his responses and in agreement with his position in almost all cases.
I really think I need to do a lot more research on who the Republicans are seriously considering for the nomination before I make a decision on the correct side of the aisle. Whoever we put in there needs to be articulate, intelligent and have the best interests of the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA and all her people and businesses in mind - not just a few fratbrother cronies.
724 Days
Thursday, January 25, 2007
What to do.... what to do....
A connundrum, if you will.
Ever since my niece was born - heck, ever since my niece was announced as being concieved, I've had this dream of being able to present my brother with a copy of his favorite childhood book, published in 1959, out of print for lo, these many years.
I've never found it. Until this morning. I happened to be on Amazon looking for a book on homebrewing mead and a few CD's that I need to replace because they got oogie or stolen. For some unearthly reason I decided to "search" for the title of SPTLM's childhood favorite book... and they have it.
It's a rare book, apparently, there is only one person offering it, it's used and kind of not the best condition - but it exists. They want $50 for it.
So.... considering the rather abyssmal state of the relationship between my "brother" and myself - I wonder if I should just forget about it - or go with my instinct and find a way to get it for him just because I think it would be cool.
Mind you, I have no delusions that this will somehow "fix" things between SPTLM and myself - that can only come with a concerted effort on both our parts, and specifically the decision on his part to accept that I am who I am and I'm not going to pretend to be stupid or subordinate to him..."divinity" degree or no degree.
I also found Amanda's childhood favorite library book. Again - she's not on speaking terms with me, and I have no idea if or when she plans to have kids - or if she'd even have any interest in having a copy of "Bill and Pete"... but it's really rather tempting - and significantly inexpensive enough for me to purchase even if it isn't appreciated.
I think I will certainly get Bill and Pete. Still not sure on the other one.
Suggestions appreciated.
725 days - ITMFA
Ever since my niece was born - heck, ever since my niece was announced as being concieved, I've had this dream of being able to present my brother with a copy of his favorite childhood book, published in 1959, out of print for lo, these many years.
I've never found it. Until this morning. I happened to be on Amazon looking for a book on homebrewing mead and a few CD's that I need to replace because they got oogie or stolen. For some unearthly reason I decided to "search" for the title of SPTLM's childhood favorite book... and they have it.
It's a rare book, apparently, there is only one person offering it, it's used and kind of not the best condition - but it exists. They want $50 for it.
So.... considering the rather abyssmal state of the relationship between my "brother" and myself - I wonder if I should just forget about it - or go with my instinct and find a way to get it for him just because I think it would be cool.
Mind you, I have no delusions that this will somehow "fix" things between SPTLM and myself - that can only come with a concerted effort on both our parts, and specifically the decision on his part to accept that I am who I am and I'm not going to pretend to be stupid or subordinate to him..."divinity" degree or no degree.
I also found Amanda's childhood favorite library book. Again - she's not on speaking terms with me, and I have no idea if or when she plans to have kids - or if she'd even have any interest in having a copy of "Bill and Pete"... but it's really rather tempting - and significantly inexpensive enough for me to purchase even if it isn't appreciated.
I think I will certainly get Bill and Pete. Still not sure on the other one.
Suggestions appreciated.
725 days - ITMFA
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Ice Cream
My dad sent this to me. When I read it, I immediately thought of BBC.
Last week I took my children to a restaurant. My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace. As we bowed our heads he said, "God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! Amen!"
Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby I heard a woman remark, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!"
Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?"
As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table. He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer. "Really?" my son asked. "Cross my heart," the man replied. Then in a theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes."
Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life. He picked up his sundae and without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already."
Last week I took my children to a restaurant. My six-year-old son asked if he could say grace. As we bowed our heads he said, "God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Mom gets us ice cream for dessert. And Liberty and justice for all! Amen!"
Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby I heard a woman remark, "That's what's wrong with this country. Kids today don't even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!"
Hearing this, my son burst into tears and asked me, "Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?"
As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table. He winked at my son and said, "I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer. "Really?" my son asked. "Cross my heart," the man replied. Then in a theatrical whisper he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), "Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes."
Naturally, I bought my kids ice cream at the end of the meal. My son stared at his for a moment and then did something I will remember the rest of my life. He picked up his sundae and without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, "Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already."
I thought only Congress could declare war...
And yet, as I hear it, George Walker Bush, the Pretender to the Presidency, is sending aircraft carriers to harass and inflame Iran.
This man is just foaming at the mouth to try and get another 9/11/01 tragedy inflicted on our country so that he can declare a state of emergency, declare martial law, invoke his "rights" under the Military Commissions Act and suspend elections in 08.
The Repukelicans have inflicted a dictator upon us, and there is apparently dickall we can do about it. In fact, 83 year old men who make politically charged statements against George Walker Bush are being visited by his S.S. ... I mean FBI - for making "Threats against the president" by saying that Iraq hung the wrong man when they hung Saddam. Nowhere did the elderly gentleman every once name George Walker Bush, nor did he specifically state whom he considered to be the "right man". But that was enough for the FBI to come knocking on his door.
And now, it appears, the Shrub is going to inflict another tax upon us - or try to. In the guise of "universal health care", he is going to force our employers to consider their portion of the Medical Insurance premiums they pay for us to be counted as "Earned Income"
Do you know what this means, boys and girls? This means that the government will take MORE TAX DOLLARS OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK TO COVER YOUR INSURANCE - and then turn right back around and ALLOW you to DEDUCT it from income on your tax return. End result? Less dollars for you to spend on a weekly basis. You'll be allowing the government to play with your money for a whole year before you get to use it. AND - for those of you who are hovering just below the next tax bracket - you'll get kicked up into that new tax bracket, and therefore end up paying more taxes in the long run!
So much for the "Dems" being the ones to add sneaky new taxes, huh?
727 days. ITMFA - before more damage is done
This man is just foaming at the mouth to try and get another 9/11/01 tragedy inflicted on our country so that he can declare a state of emergency, declare martial law, invoke his "rights" under the Military Commissions Act and suspend elections in 08.
The Repukelicans have inflicted a dictator upon us, and there is apparently dickall we can do about it. In fact, 83 year old men who make politically charged statements against George Walker Bush are being visited by his S.S. ... I mean FBI - for making "Threats against the president" by saying that Iraq hung the wrong man when they hung Saddam. Nowhere did the elderly gentleman every once name George Walker Bush, nor did he specifically state whom he considered to be the "right man". But that was enough for the FBI to come knocking on his door.
And now, it appears, the Shrub is going to inflict another tax upon us - or try to. In the guise of "universal health care", he is going to force our employers to consider their portion of the Medical Insurance premiums they pay for us to be counted as "Earned Income"
Do you know what this means, boys and girls? This means that the government will take MORE TAX DOLLARS OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK TO COVER YOUR INSURANCE - and then turn right back around and ALLOW you to DEDUCT it from income on your tax return. End result? Less dollars for you to spend on a weekly basis. You'll be allowing the government to play with your money for a whole year before you get to use it. AND - for those of you who are hovering just below the next tax bracket - you'll get kicked up into that new tax bracket, and therefore end up paying more taxes in the long run!
So much for the "Dems" being the ones to add sneaky new taxes, huh?
727 days. ITMFA - before more damage is done
Monday, January 22, 2007
Rerun Post because I don't feel like trying to link it and I got tagged again and I don't have any new answers and this is easier than being creative
Name a book that you want to share so much that you keep giving away copies:
"Crocodile on the Sandbank" by Elizabeth Peters. Of course, I have to be careful upon whom I bestow it - not everyone has the same sense of humor that I do. Sorry I'm not into passing out "deep" books. I always feel as if I'm being percieved as judgemental or proseltyzing if I do that.
Name a piece of music that changed the way you listen to music:
I've got 2, both waltzes. First one was "The Blue Danube Waltz" by Strauss. When I was about 12 or 13, I got into my mom's record collection and messed around with the record player for an afternoon while they were out. This was the first piece of classical music that hit me strongly, especially having been brought up with those heavy Bach-esque Lutheran Hymns. This was classical music that was light and ethereal, uplifting instead of thumping and ponderous.
The second is the waltz from "Eugene Onegin" by Tchaikovsky. This was the first ballet recital piece that my daughter danced to en-pointe. I was so proud of her, I actually cried. She worked so hard to get and to master her "toe-shoes", and she was so beautiful and graceful, and danced her heart out. Now that she's grown and gone and not dancing anymore, I still picture her dancing when I hear certain types of music.
Name a film you can watch again and again without fatigue:
At the risk of sounding trite - "The Blues Brothers" (The first one!) I first saw this movie during the early 1980's when I'd just gotten married and moved to Colorado from my home in the Western Suburbs of Chicago. I was so homesick, and the movie was "home" to me. Sure, the plot is silly, but the landmarks can make me smile even now (My daughter was married in that county office building, and I have video of her dancing in Daley Center right in front of those windows that the Bluesmobile crashes through) and the music... Oh my, the music!
Name a performer for whom you suspend of all disbelief:
Interestingly, because I'm not a big fan of most of his films, Dustin Hoffman always "IS" his character for me. When I see him on screen, my reaction when first encountering his character in a role is never "Oh, look, there's Dustin Hoffman", but rather a belief that I am seeing the person he is portraying. Jack Nicholson has this quality too - Tom Hanks as well, but to a lesser degree.
Name a work of art you'd like to live with:
The temple of Hathor at Abu Simbel
Name a work of fiction which has penetrated your real life:
Oh my - just one? They all do, you know. As I read them, I assimilate bits and pieces as they impress me. However, if I have to pick one, I think "All Quiet on the Western Front" did more to shape my views about politics and war than just about anything I've read since.
Name a punch line that always makes you laugh:
"I think... no, I am positive... that you are the most unattractive man I have ever met in my entire life. You know, in the short time we've been together, you have demonstrated EVERY loathsome characteristic of the male personality and even discovered a few new ones. You are physically repulsive, intellectually retarded, you're morally reprehensible, vulgar, insensitive, selfish, stupid, you have no taste, a lousy sense of humor and you smell. You're not even interesting enough to make me sick."
"Crocodile on the Sandbank" by Elizabeth Peters. Of course, I have to be careful upon whom I bestow it - not everyone has the same sense of humor that I do. Sorry I'm not into passing out "deep" books. I always feel as if I'm being percieved as judgemental or proseltyzing if I do that.
Name a piece of music that changed the way you listen to music:
I've got 2, both waltzes. First one was "The Blue Danube Waltz" by Strauss. When I was about 12 or 13, I got into my mom's record collection and messed around with the record player for an afternoon while they were out. This was the first piece of classical music that hit me strongly, especially having been brought up with those heavy Bach-esque Lutheran Hymns. This was classical music that was light and ethereal, uplifting instead of thumping and ponderous.
The second is the waltz from "Eugene Onegin" by Tchaikovsky. This was the first ballet recital piece that my daughter danced to en-pointe. I was so proud of her, I actually cried. She worked so hard to get and to master her "toe-shoes", and she was so beautiful and graceful, and danced her heart out. Now that she's grown and gone and not dancing anymore, I still picture her dancing when I hear certain types of music.
Name a film you can watch again and again without fatigue:
At the risk of sounding trite - "The Blues Brothers" (The first one!) I first saw this movie during the early 1980's when I'd just gotten married and moved to Colorado from my home in the Western Suburbs of Chicago. I was so homesick, and the movie was "home" to me. Sure, the plot is silly, but the landmarks can make me smile even now (My daughter was married in that county office building, and I have video of her dancing in Daley Center right in front of those windows that the Bluesmobile crashes through) and the music... Oh my, the music!
Name a performer for whom you suspend of all disbelief:
Interestingly, because I'm not a big fan of most of his films, Dustin Hoffman always "IS" his character for me. When I see him on screen, my reaction when first encountering his character in a role is never "Oh, look, there's Dustin Hoffman", but rather a belief that I am seeing the person he is portraying. Jack Nicholson has this quality too - Tom Hanks as well, but to a lesser degree.
Name a work of art you'd like to live with:
The temple of Hathor at Abu Simbel
Name a work of fiction which has penetrated your real life:
Oh my - just one? They all do, you know. As I read them, I assimilate bits and pieces as they impress me. However, if I have to pick one, I think "All Quiet on the Western Front" did more to shape my views about politics and war than just about anything I've read since.
Name a punch line that always makes you laugh:
"I think... no, I am positive... that you are the most unattractive man I have ever met in my entire life. You know, in the short time we've been together, you have demonstrated EVERY loathsome characteristic of the male personality and even discovered a few new ones. You are physically repulsive, intellectually retarded, you're morally reprehensible, vulgar, insensitive, selfish, stupid, you have no taste, a lousy sense of humor and you smell. You're not even interesting enough to make me sick."
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