Thursday, February 11, 2016

Cox Communications - WHAT A BUNCH OF DICKS

Unfortunately, the company I work for is forced to do business with Cox Communications (A bunch of Dicks) at our Arkansas location.  I say unfortunately, because Cox Communications (A bunch of Dicks) is completely incompetent and unable to even run their own website.

A month or so ago, Citibank in its Infinite Wisdom decided to cancel our company credit card and reissue another one with a different number because the original card had maybe possibly been "compromised".  We did not ask them to do this.  We found no fraudulent charges, nor any indication that the card was being used in a manner we were not happy with - but Citibank apparently decided differently.

I went to work calling all our vendors who bill us on a monthly basis and charge the credit card automatically.  I called Cox Communications (A bunch of Dicks) and tried to change the information.  I got told I had to do it online.  I tried to do it online, but their website would not take my login information.

I called "Customer Support" ("Hi, my name is Dick, and I can help you" - except they never can) and got the runaround shuffle - finally talked to someone who said she would change the information for me.  Gave her the new card info.

A week ago I got a letter in the mail informing us that our payment had "bounced" because the card we had was denied, and that they were now going to charge us $30.00 for a "returned check fee".  If we tried to pay over the phone, we would incur an ADDITIONAL $10.00 fee for the privilege.

WHAT
A
BUNCH
OF
DICKS

So I called again.  I fought with the Stepford Customer Service Rep and got them to get rid of the $30 charge.  They wouldn't back down, however, on the $10 fee to pay over the phone.  Went to login online to pay - still can't get to their site.  

Called their Tech Support line, they don't have us set up online anymore.  DICKS

So we re-registered, I paid the bill online with the new card, and the Tech Support guy helped get the credit card information updated and changed.

Today I got an e-mail.  It said that they had cancelled our auto-bill-pay because "The envelope expired"

I called to find out WTF they meant by that.  Got put on hold because "Hi, my name is Dick, and I can help you" couldn't help me and needed to transfer me to the Arkansas office,  He put me on hold.  He never came back.  10 minutes later, I hung up and called Cox Communications (A bunch of Dicks) again.

This time I got a female dick.  She too wanted to transfer me to Arkansas.  I told her about the 10 minute waste of time, and she assured me that she could help me get past that.  By this time I've rolled my eyes so many times I'm getting myself dizzy.

Apparently there actually are a few Dicks down in Arkansas, and one of them talked to me.  Told me that I had been supposed to "verify the autopay set-up".  Told me they had called me.  I beg to differ.  Nobody called.  The dicks called the Arkansas location, which is not a location that would have the information they would need, so the voice mail that they left was deleted by the solo employee down there.  

The story goes on.  The ridiculousness of the so-called "Customer Service" dicks knows no bounds.

And then they said it would take 1 or 2 "billing cycles" for the change to take effect.  Cox Communications (A Bunch of Dicks©) - YOU SUCK