Howdy There, Dontcha Know - you betcha!

Sarah Palin.

Sarah, Sarah, Sarah...

*much headshaking and closed-eye deep breathing*

Yeah. Ahem.

When my daughter was very small, I made her a bunch of crocheted play-pillows for her bedroom. A big yellow sun with a happy face, a pink and grey ruffly one with pink ribbons, A white lacy one with multi-colored shapes on it, a big orange VW-car one, and two that looked like clowns.

Now, when I grew up, clowns were funny and happy and positive and able to fit 20 or 30 of themselves into a small sedan. I thought clowns were terrific.

Little did I know as a young mother, that (probably thanks to John Gacy) clowns would become horror movie fodder - and that ICP would eventually replace Bozo and Cookie as the stereotype of clowns. Clowns are scary now.

(I'll never forget the day I pissed off 2 yr. old Amanda and she ran into her bedroom and grabbed the clown pillow and came out with it over her face, declaring angrily: "I WILL BE A CLOWN AT YOU" - even then she was way ahead of me and I was clueless.)

I also when young had to deal with the hubris and taunting of the "Cheerleader" crowd. Those "popular" kids who made a point of making everyone else feel dumb or outside. Never mind that I had more brains in my pinky toenail than any of them had in their entire extended families - they had CONFIDENCE!! They had PERKINESS!! They were CHEERLEADERS!!!

Cheerleaders are scarier than clowns.

So what could possibly be scarier than a clown cheerleader running for the 2nd highest office in the land? A perky, twinkly, winking, posturing airhead who has 1/2 dozen little catchphrases in her head and plays tiddlywinks with them instead of actually answering the questions posed to her? Winking at the men through the camera and betting that they'll vote with their "little head"? Someone who doesn't even know the meaning of the phrase "Achilles heel" - but cha know, darn it, that was a trick question, you betcha!

So what could possibly be scarier than a clown cheerleader running for the 2nd highest office in the land? Having her win.

108 days